Jack makes me laugh. All the time.
This is the best part of being a dad. And the thing that I didn’t see coming. The curiosity in his eyes as he surveys his environment. The slow pickup of eye contact with me. Then the little tweak of the mouth, cracking a smile.
It gets me every time.
10/1/26
I’ve been struggling to put my finger on it. How to define this seemingly huge jump.
It started with a tidal wave of attention. His attention to everything. And a huge uptick in the attention that was required of me. A relentless application of the spin move (this will develop beautifully on the court) in every situation. In my arms. In the car seat. On the changing table. On the floor. And while he’s at it, why not just ensure that I never have the chance to wear sunglasses or a hat.
Impossible to ignore. Omnipresent. Part existential crisis, part fun. Strap in — this roller coaster is scary, fun, fast.
Now that I’ve had a few weeks to let “all of it settle” I’m coming to realize that there’s a more subtle movement happening in parallel. He is developing a personality. Curious, enthusiastic, happy, engaged, silly. It feels as if he’s showing his first signs of what is uniquely Jack Renfro.
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The month of September was so fun. Jack was a true MVP.
I think there was a very healthy dose of anxious optimism going into this month. Two weeks in the mountains. There were very natural things to be concerned about. High elevation, temperature swings, thin air, sun burns, dry skin. Uprooting routine, a very different environment, impacts on sleep. Hoping that his body and mind would be up for big hikes and long days.
The first day was a small 1-2 mile hike. Then the next day 2-3 miles. Then 7. And again. And again. Day after day. More ambitious. More elevation. More hours. Longer drives. I never found this guys line. He was up for more. 100+ miles and the dude was ready to keep going.
He loved the backpack. Most of the time he was wide eyed with a huge smile. I know this because virtually every person I encountered over those 100+ miles would mention it. Crazy how a baby can appreciate and download the beauty of nature. I think the key was his ability (and enjoyment) of naps.
The funny thing. We couldn’t really chill. Stumbling into an alpine lake for a snack / bottle / hang out. Those were short lived. He wanted to keep going.
Motion has been a nice through line. It started with long loops in the neighborhood in the stroller, then upgraded to the Bjorn with him strapped closely to me. Now the backpack as the primary medium.
Next up: bike. The Trek store has my Baby EV Pro Shotgun seat waiting. I’m eager to test this new medium. With motion as the North Star, biking is the obvious destination. An activity that optimizes fun for both parties. Manifestation is in full swing right now. This will work.
8/14/26
Steam Showers and Hot Tubs is the ultimate tell that this is my son.
A dip into the ocean?
Fuck no. Too cold. Let’s go to the hot tub.
Pool that’s a touch chilly, even on a super hot day?
Ehhhhhhh, yeah sure but can we transfer to the hot tub?
Hot tub?
Perfection.
I enjoy his liking of bath time. The extended bath time + steam machine is the golden jewel of my week. I treasure these moments.
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My favorite activity with Jack has been yard work. The seemingly content and relaxed vibe when walking around the yard watering all the plants. There’s something magical when his uncoordinated little hands reach out for a flower. It’s glorious.
He’s started to outgrow the front body carrier. A tad big and a tad squirley. What was once the ultimate ace in my pocket has slowly faded. But I picked up the kid backpack, and I think that’s a new chapter. Early signals are that he loves it.
We’re heading up to Idyllwild this weekend to tease out the gear and the hiking and the mileage and the elevation and all the stuff. Sierra September awaits. A year delayed from when my sabbatical hit — and I’m so fucking stoked.
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The early morning routine has slowly evolved to getting Jack out of his crib and bringing him to our bed. The first ~20 minutes of the day cuddling. Establishing each day with a “right side of the bed” tone. The best part of having a baby right here.
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The ways in which he attacks any beverage. A full face attack to anything cold. The tongue is big and intentional. Arms reached out wanting the full force of the cold on his face. It’s a guaranteed good time.
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A wise man once said: “but it wasn't all fun and soaking butts”.
The 10 days of initiation into “this is what it’s like when your kid is sick and pissed off” hit me like a ton of bricks. More on that here.
7/11/26
The majority of my credit card transactions in 2026 - $2.39 at 7/11. The ladies love Jack. Hot coffee in the mornings, cold coffees in the afternoons. I miss the walking. In my paternity leave I would just walk and walk and walk. I remember 19,000 steps on a random day without leaving the little neighborhood, and surely involved many 7/11 circuits in one day. Less of that now, but when I do get into the circuit I’m stoked.
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I can pretend to eat his ear, and he will reliably laugh. I can reliably count on a big smile when he goes into daycare, as much as the reliable smile when I pick him up in the afternoon. Reliably happy in the morning, with the long and patient chit chat before we start the day.
All of these things bring a reliable flow of joy in the day to day.
I was very cautious early on to celebrate prematurely. I remember thinking that in week one. And each week thereafter. At each turn, knocking the wood, hoping for more.
We’re now four and a half months in, and we’re in a serious groove. It’s nice that the chaotic game of question master has largely been muted. There’s a lot less thinking. Stuff just happens, and everyone seems to be in a good mood.
Cruise control. Top down. Good music. Good company. Good vibes. Good kid. Lucked out.
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Musings —
Blu -- still hasn't engaged with Jack, does enjoy napping on the sheepskin rug in his room though. The treats from Jack will be coming soon.
Daycare — there’s a sense of joy when you walk in. You can see Jack is happy when he arrives and when he leaves. He’s learning from the other kids, you can see it and sense it.
Babysitter — locking in a babysitter has been huge. Good for Jack and good for us. Fun date nights sustain a sense of balance. Adult fun needs to be part of the mix. Baby fun is super fun, but adult fun is important too.
Mouth -- Jack's gross. He parks his hands in his mouth and is always drooling. And then you layer in the gross ass stale parmesan vibe of his milk. Nasty. He once drooled into my mouth, I was not down.
Drinks -- the ferocity of his approach towards any type of beverage. A beer can, water bottle, wine glass. Dude just attacks it with his face, full face licks. It's fucking hilarious.
Sleep -- approaching 100% sleep through nights, LFG.
Rollin — dude learns to roll over, and you can trust that within a few days the kid is going to be rolling all day. This is how it works. You see one thing, and then that thing happens constantly until the next thing. And it’s a never ending cycle.
Laughin — dude laughs all the time. It’s amazing.
Fathers Day -- went on a sick Amtrak trip. I want to turn that into a tradition. Also played disc golf at hole 8 with Julia, Jack, and Blu. That will be remembered forever. I also aced 8 that same week. Backhand is back.
Wisconsin — our first big trip was insanely successful. Jack was loved by all. The trophy at the bar. A true feeling of community. He crushed the boat life, manned the life jacket like a boss. Napped like a boss. The Geakes are the best. It was peak.
TV — Jack loves. I love. We love. Baby Einstein season 1 episode 1 and 6 are legit good TV. I’m all for the cut up puppy and bear videos. I also love dancing to YouTube music content. And he never tells me no, which is appreciated.
September — booked my first month of sabbatical, all nature, mostly with Jack, super pumped. Missing nature and excited to over correct on that.
Julia -- it was said "the worst part of having a kid is the shift in relationship with your spouse". I disagree. It's made a great thing even greater.
6/9 (Happy 69 Day)
The Basis - Lack of Afro
As I take off on the first plane, it feels good to have this song play at full volume as I drift back into the writing. My happy place.
This will be the first of many trips away from Jack. I’m living in a wide open world of rediscovered firsts, which will continue to spin for many many years to come.
This plane flight, similar to my first day back at disc golf, similar to my first dinner out with Julia, similar to my first night out with the boys — a different layer of gratitude, stoke, perspective. Joy to just write and look out at the endless clouds below me.
Distance makes the heart grow fonder. When I first went back to work, it somehow became the perfect distance from Jack. To focus on work for a few hours - it made coming back to Jack more fun. Then again when he went to daycare. Multiple hours of complete quiet. A welcomed and balanced distance that increased my joy when Jack came home.
Distance and time away is super important. I frequently preach the value of vacations in work. Vacations lead to a reset. Resets are super important in the marathon of a 40+ year working period of life. LSD is a great hard reset in one day. A vacation also does the trick. You come back to work with more energy. You have perspective that allows you to shed the small stress that exists in the weeds.
I see no reason why it would be any different with a baby. You come back better because it’s healthy to refuel the tank. Any my fuel in Nashville? Seltzers (alcoholic of course) and IPAs at the pool with my friends(**).
5/10/26, Mothers Day
Mother, Kacey Musgraves - the gift that keeps on giving
Mother’s Day holds a very different meaning this year. The density of work, attention, and effort over a sustained 10 week (and forever to go) stretch has been a test unlike any other. The benefit of that forced step back, to acknowledge the effort and celebrate the journey. I welcome it.
Seeing the growth of your relationship with Jack has been magical.
I wrote that to Julia, and it’s truly been one of the best parts. With each year, the value and appreciation of each additional year intensifies. We are extremely lucky to have had 17 years to build our foundation together. And in that 17 years we’ve developed a depth of relationship that is unique and rare at my age. This depth has shown itself in the 10 weeks with Jack across a vast range. I see the best of our relationship, friendship, and love in my son.
Today is worthy of celebration.